Finding Kriss part 4 (well a back story, one may call it)

To read a different point of view go here


"Are you okay?" Asked Erifia as we entered her ship.

"I think so," I answered as started to pondered over the test results from before.

I looked over at Erifia and watched as her eyes lowered their icy barrier and let her concern show through, "Then why where you so quiet on the tripe over here?"

"I was," as I quickly wiped away a tear "running a small test."

"What do you mean by test?" she asked.

"A blood test," I started to say then thought better of it and added "I ran a DNA test against myself and someone else."

I saw a look of surprise in Erifia‘s eyes as she asked "Who?"

"The test showed that Master Luminara in fact my mother." I said almost silently to myself as tears fell silently down my face.

"Wait!" She said as the pieces clicked into place,"....so your master could be your mother?"

"There’s no could be about it, Erifia." I said as I wiped away the tears. "The test showed that she is in fact be my mother."

Erifia eyes went wide with surprise, then narrowed as she stated "Isn't that against the rules?" I stood there waiting for her to yell at me or at scream both how much against the rules it was. Instead she calmly said this "If so, I am so proud of her, and you."

Huh? Did I hear her right??? She’s proud of us? Is this the same Erifia, I have come to know and trust? My mind raced as I stood there and just stared at her.

After what felt like an hour pass by, Erifia quietly asked "Do you need a hug?"

I barely nodded my head yes when I felt Erifia’s arm wrap around me in a tight hug. My mind raced as I hugged her back. My only thoughts were the council is not going to be so happy if they hear about this.

"Are you going to be okay?" asked Erifia lightly as she rubbed my back.

"I don’t know, I think so." I said trying to calm my mind.

I heard Erifia lightly laugh as she asked "Want me to go and kill someone for you?"

I looked at my friend wondering if she was joking or if she was really willing to so for me. I lightly said "No!" I hope she’s joking, I told myself over and over again.

Erifia raised an eyebrow and asked "Are you sure?"

"Yes I’m sure." I said thinking maybe she’s not joking.








"Do you think Luminara will tell you about your father?" Erifia asked. I was upset that she‘d even ask such a thing without even thinking.

"I'm not sure she will, I'm sure she does want to talk about it, but you and I both know that the code does not allow for that sort of thing to happen." I answered as I thought why would she want to keep this a secret from the council in the first place.

"The code," Erifia said as she let out a simple hmph, "So why did it happen?"

"I don't know." I said as Erifia led my towards a room in her ship. As we entered I noticed that it was her bedroom.

Since we have never really talked much about her family I made up my mind and asked her “What's your father like?"

Erifia eyes narrowed as she said “He's the most miserable man in the entire galaxy. When I was a child he sent me away to the temple because I was a financial burden on him."

I could feel her pain, and hate. I didn‘t even think I just asked "You hate him for that, don't you?"

"Let's just say, I hate Aayla Secura more than anyone, but my father could quickly take her place," Erifia said quickly .

I worried wondered if that what I would have been ended up like that to if my father had done the same thing to me. Without even thinking, I asked "I wonder is my father would have done the same thing?"

"No, because of your mother," Erifia frankly stated.

My mind raced as she said that, was she so sure of that because her mother fought to keep her. I then asked her "What's your mother like?" I hoped that she would say that her mother had fought to keep her but instead I saw tears running down her face.

"She was the most beautiful woman in all the galaxy... She loved me so much she gave her own life to let mine come into the world... I would have been so different if she was alive, I'd never have become a Jedi, I'd have probably been a twi'lek dancing girl, like her..." Erifia sighed, and she wiped away any trace of tears. "I always get like this“ she started to say then she stopped crying and continued on to say .. “have a picture, its the only part of her I have..." As she handed the picture over to me.
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I looked at the picture and thought if only she knew what it was like to have a master as a mother she‘d wouldn‘t be so and without even thinking I mindless said "It must be hard to know that I've had all this time with my mother and you only got a picture..." …oh why did I say that? I cried out in my mind. That was almost childlike Barriss! I told myself over and over again.

I stared at Erifia as she clenched her hands into fist. Oh, no! I thought to myself, she’s going to hit me for saying that.

"And? And what? You're master is still alive... You were going to say that too?" Erifai screamed, "Weren't you?"

I stepped away from Erifia and watched as she brought her hand up a side the wall. I just stood there, waited to see if she would say anything more. When she s sat down on the bed and scooted over to a far corner and curled up into a ball. I felt my heart sink to my feet as I thought to myself, way to go.. you just lost yourself a good friend.

I knew that I had done wrong and there’s not point in hiding it. I could feel my anger get the better of me. As I waited I told myself, if she going to hit me let her. Then I felt myself break apart in the inside.

I then walked over stomping my feet as I went over to her. I could feel myself getting madder by the second.

“ERIFIA!”I yelled as my face got red with anger.

“ERIFIA!” I yelled again and without thinking I hit her hard on the side of the face. “IF YOU THINK HAVING MY MOTHER FOR A MASTER WAS A WONDERFUL… YOUR WRONG!”

Next thing I knew my knees gave out and I was on the floor crying.. "Erifia, she wasn't loving....her only real concern was that I'd make it to Jedi Knighthood....does that sound like a mother to you?" I cried as everything came out. All the years, of being her padawan and all the times I had received punishment for small things that I did wrong.



“Barriss?” Erifia asked, “Why are you crying?”

I could barely hear Erifia talking, but between my sobbing I could only make out that she was saying something but what?

My mind raced as I tried to find out what she said. But the only thoughts that were going through my mind was, she’s mad at me! My body started to violently shake as the words started to sink in. Over and over again my mind kept on repeating she’s mad at me.

I tried to calm my mind and stop my body from shaking but the more I tried the more violently my body was shaking .

“Barriss, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” I could hear how worried Erifia was but when I didn’t answer her. She asked again, “Barriss, what’s wrong?”

I tried to find my voice but all I could do was ball my hand into fist and started to stuttering “I………..hit…….you……” I could feel my face getting red with shame as I continued “broke….healers code …………………sorry.” I couldn’t look her in the eyes when I said I was sorry.




“Barriss… Tell me what I did to warrant the hit… Please? I’ll never tell anyone. I promise…” Erifia quietly asked as she slowly rubbed my back.

(TBC - To Be Continued)