Silence (golden or not?)

Read these first so your not lost
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3


But I was sad, but try as I am I couldn’t let go of it. I buried it deep inside me as I forced myself to smile.

As Luminara sat down she held out the plate with the fruit on it.

"Thank you." I said as I took the plate from her and setting the plate down between us. As I tried to encourage her to eat some of the fruit with me.

Luminara sat back and watched as I nibbled on one of the pieces of fruit before taking one for herself.

As I sat there eating, I began pondering what she really thought of me. Was I her daughter? Or her Padawan? Or her former Padawan? Or did she think of me now as just another knight that she knows? My thoughts were betraying me, or was my heart?

I could feel the my tears building up, threatening to fall.

I heard Luminara take a sharp breath as she sat back and waited for me to finish the piece of fruit that I was eating.

I as swallowed down the last bite, I slowly asked "What's wrong?"

Fear shot through my body as I waited for her to answer. Luminara just sat there staring but not really looking at me as her eyes narrowed.

I could feel my anger building as I sat there waiting for her to say something, anything would have been better then the silence that was sitting between us.

I wanted to yell at her, telling how bad she made my life. Oh how I wanted to activate my lightsaber and strike her down. I fought with myself to keep control, but I knew that it was a losing game. .

'I am better then this!' I told myself. But was I??

"Barriss!?" Luminara quietly said. "It's time for us to go before the council."

My heart started to race as she said those words and without thinking I said "Yes Master!"

'But how could I go now and face the council or even face the healers later on?' I asked myself as I pushed the chair away from the table.